How to make a good first impression during the conversation?
“Personally I am very fond of strawberries and cream, but I have found that for some strange reason, fish prefer worms. So when I went fishing, I didn’t think about what I wanted. I thought about what they wanted.”
Many people are bothered with a question how to be an interesting interlocutor and make a good impression in conversation. The truth is that it is not that difficult. Famous writer and speaker Dale Carnegie gives a lot of pieces of advice on communication in his books about the art of speech. Radius has chosen a couple of the most important and interesting ones that will definitely be handy for you in communication.
If you want to attract someone’s attention, it is very important to understand one simple rule – talk about the things that are interesting for him or her. This theory is simple and familiar to everyone, but how can we use it practice?
It is useful to know that the sphere of your interlocutor’s interest can be divided into six categories: “people”, “place”, “time”, “values”, “process” and “things”. Usually two or three themes are favorite – a person will discuss them with a great pleasure and mostly ignore the other topics. In order to understand what is interesting to a particular person just listen to what kind of category he keeps to and what question he asks.
Let’s try to analyze each thematic category in detail. So, “people” goes first and it is connected to the question “who?”. Many people have particular interest in lives of others. Telling stories about travels such kind of person will first of all talk about people he got acquainted or went with. If you invite him to the party he will definitely ask “Who else is going to come?” as it is really important to him.
The next category is “place” and the question you will frequently hear is “where?”. Sense of direction and space is very important for those people. He usually has his favorite armchair or place at the table and won’t let anybody else occupy it.
“Time” category has a great importance too and the corresponding question is “when?”. Such person values everything connected to time. Before going to some party he will surely ask “When will it start? When is it going to finish? What time does the last bus arrive?” etc.
The “Values” category has a great significance for many people as well and the favorite question here is “what for?”. It is very important for this person to understand the value and usefulness of what he is doing. He is looking for the meaning of everything and is constantly talking about his values and beliefs.
One more category is “process” and the main question here is “how?”. It is very important for a person to know how everything is going to happen, in what way he will be doing something and to understand the sequence of actions he has to take. The most necessary thing for him at work is deriving pleasure from what he is doing.
And finally the last category “things” with the frequently used question “what?”. This type of person pays lots of attention to objects and things around, as they are extremely interesting to him.
It turns out that listening to what people say and what questions they ask offers you an easy way to find out suitable topics for each person. You can develop the discussion of things that are the closest and the most valuable for your interlocutor. Be attentive, try not to miss the important details and you will always be interesting in a conversation. Communicate with pleasure and stay in Radius!