Simple tips to improve communication skills
Communication is both the easiest and the very complex human skill, as we master it at a very early age, but do not cease to learn to speak beautifully and correctly to an old age. It turns out that the process of learning to communicate accompanies us throughout our life.
Have you ever wondered why some people find common ground and establish communication with strangers very quickly, while others take a long time to establish contact and they can not always talk normally even with their family members and close friends?
The answer is one - those people have different communication skills. Let's get to know how to pump our ability to communicate and win the listener’s trust.
Learn to listen
You may say it’s quite easy. And you’re right! But still we’re not often actually listening to what people say. Listening in a right way is much more than just giving a pause for our interlocutor to say a phrase or two. It’s not just keeping silent for a moment taking time to think about our next sentence. Try to fully understand what’s being said and display some interest to the other person’s words. Believe or not, your friends, colleagues and new acquaintances will appreciate your attention and interest in what they’re telling you.
As we have already discussed, your listening skills have a great value. You will be a much more pleasant person to talk to if you give some feedback to what you’ve heard and ask a couple of questions about the most interesting parts of the story. There’s one more thing – Instead of trying to stir up conversation on mundane topics like the weather, ask the other person questions (“Got any plans for the summer?” or “What are you reading lately?”) and engage in their answers. And remember – it’s more important to be interested than to be interesting.
Try to focus on your interlocutor and catch not only the general idea of the message, but also feel what was said “between the lines”. If the other person is all out of sorts, do not bother him/her with unnecessary questions and the main thing – don’t get offended right away. Try to understand what could arouse such negative feelings and cheer him or her up if needed.
Do not interrupt
It can be the main signal of lack of respect from your side. When you don’t let somebody finish the phrase, you show to the person that you’re not interested in what he/she is saying. If it happened by accident then you have to apologize and let your interlocutor finish before you will start expressing your idea.
Most people like to laugh. Use your sense of humor to break the ice, to lower barriers and gain the affection of others. Don’t be afraid to be funny or clever, but do ensure your humor is appropriate to the situation. You can also try to tell an interesting story or a funny life situation if it fits to the conversation. You won’t even notice how your talk will become easy and friendly.
Few people want to be around someone who is frequently miserable. Do your best to be friendly, upbeat and positive with other people. If you maintain a positive and cheerful attitude to life you will arise only positive emotions in people’s hearts and they are more likely to respond positively to you.
Avoid moaning and complaining
When you’re constantly complaining that life is unfair – people are very unlikely to express desire to communicate with you. If something made you lose your temper try to calm down first and only then continue communication. Sometimes the situation can get so bad that you can’t stay calm. In this case make sure that your complaint is justified, remain cool and fair and try to find a good way out of the situation.
That’s it! Those simple yet useful pieces of advice will help you change your communicative skills for the better. Sep by step you can come to realization that you’ve become an easy and pleasant person to talk to and even more - the number of good and interesting people around you is getting bigger.